Posted by: billysuperstar | July 1, 2011

Season 3, Episode 23, “Fraternity Reunion”

Pre-Credits Gag:  Michelle interrupts Jesse’s guitar playing by forcing him to play a game where they make hideous faces at each other, resulting in a bunch more screencaps that a bunch of people will lift for their tumblr pages.  Don’t forget to plug the site!

As Joey and Danny get ready for their 10-year fraternity reunion, Jesse comes home and goes on a lengthy diatribe about how much it sucks dick to drive around in the city.  After experiencing a series of unfortunate incidents on the road, he decides to spend the rest of the episode driving around the countryside for some peace and quiet.

Joey breaks Danny’s balls about how he let some sorority girls steal their fraternity seal (if you don’t know what that is, just hang in there) when they were in college so Danny agrees to steal it back at the reunion.

DJ and Kimmy Gibbler have to watch the news for homework but Kimmie Gibbler says the news is for fucking squares so they should at least get an extra tv so they can watch music videos at the same time.  I don’t know how they managed to get through this entire discussion without mentioning Milli Vanilli, but kudos to them.  Anyway, DJ goes along with Kimmie Gibbler’s plan so they carry the tv upstairs, which is a source of anxiety for Stephanie as she enters the scene.

DJ and Kimmie Gibbler manage to get the tv up the stairs without incident but then they hang it over the bannister and talk about what a rad idea it was to bring it up there and, completely unpredictably, it falls and breaks.  Danny runs in, gets totally fucking pissed off and uses the incident to vent a bunch of his hatred towards Kimmie Gibbler.  It’s always interesting to me how tv’s were treated like a sacred household item on sitcoms.  I guess it’s kind of a meta thing, right?  As such, Danny’s typical annoyance with Kimmie Gibbler is replaced by a deep feeling of being existentially threatened and he finally tells her that he’s sick of her always coming over and pulling a bunch of stupid bullshit so he bans her from the full house for 3 weeks.  DJ protests this decision so Danny continues to lecture her while Stephanie stands behind him and sort of copies his gesticulations in a way that I’m not sure is mocking or supporting or reverence or what.

The girls perform a simple hand clapping routine and the audience gives them a gigantic round of applause.  Seriously, is the audience full of rubes or what?  Joey tells Danny that he’s figured out the perfect way to get the seal back as they exit the full house, leaving DJ in charge.

So, yeah, this is the episode where Joey and Danny dress in drag.  I don’t even think I’ve ever seen this one before but I can’t say that I’m surprised for a second that it was made.  They seem to have been working their way through every completely fucking obvious sitcom cliché, and I think the only reason it’s taken them so long to get to this one is because they wasted a bunch of times doing others more than once.

Joey and Danny enter the sorority house’s reunion dressed in drag so they can steal back their seal, but first they have to adjust each others boobs and fumble their way through being questioned by other sorority women.  Eventually they spot the seal and we get to see what the fuck this thing is that they’re talking about.

It’s a stuffed seal?  I had been assuming that it was like a crest or a plaque, you know?  Why would they give a fuck about this stuffed seal?  The sorority sisters actually stole this thing and displayed it prominently in their sorority house for like 10 years.  The whole episode they’ve just been casually addressing it like it’s a given that you’d know what this thing is and then it’s like the least obvious answer.  I don’t know, maybe I’m missing something because I don’t know shit about fraternities but this just seemed a little peculiar to me.

Joey tries to figure out how to open up the case that the seal is in while a gigantic waiter makes sexual advances towards Danny.  Joey agrees to create a diversion while Danny breaks into the case so he pumps up the jams and busts out a limbo pole.  Now, you might think that the limbo is a totally ridiculous way to steal a group of people’s attention, but I’d like to remind you that this was 1989.  I don’t know what the fuck was going on in everybody’s heads, but there was about a 2 year period right around when this episode aired where you could go to any party in America and bust out a limbo pole and everyone would just automatically start lining up for that shit.  This is actually the most astute social observation this show has ever made.  Seriously, y’all know I’m the first guy to point out how stupid and absurd everything that happens on this crappy show is, but I’ve got to give them this one.  It was a pretty inexplicable phenomenon, but in the early 90’s a cure for limbo fever was found and nowadays people pretty much only remember it when it’s featured on a rerun of some shitty old show.

After referring to himself as a “limbo bimbo,” Joey gets a little too enthusiastic about finding out how low he can go and knocks his wig off.  Seeing that the jig is up, Danny makes a desperate grab for the seal and he and Joey rush the exit.  They’re taken down by a gaggle of shrieking women in a scenario that I once read an article about how Japanese businessmen will pay like $80,000 for.

After being overpowered by the women, Danny and Joey are arrested by one of them who turns out to be a cop.  The cop brings Danny and Joey into the police station and they’re arrested by Rif Hutton, who’s played a cop or a doctor or an army guy on like every tv show ever.

Joey and Danny are put in a prison cell where they try to think of a way to maintain their masculinity while being anally raped with a dress on.  Danny makes a narrow escape by requesting his phone call, leaving Joey alone to bear the brunt of the untamed prison lust.  I guess this kind of explains why Danny would keep a guy like Joey around.  Sure, he’s a worthless idiot, but I guess that every now and again it can help to have a sacrificial lamb handy.

Danny calls DJ and asks her to get either Grandma or Rebecca Donaldson to come bail them out.  I’ve got 10 million bucks that says that Grandma is unavailable for some reason.  Danny returns to the prison cell, where the prisoners are feeling less hostile after working all of their rape tension out on Joey.  One of the rapers recognizes Danny as the host of Wake Up, San Francisco and it turns out that all of the prisoners are big fans.  Well, at least that answers my question of who watches Danny’s show.  Cartoonish convicts, that’s who.

DJ is unable to find Grandma (because she fell into a dimensional vortex) or Rebecca Donaldson (because it suited the story) so she decides to go bail Danny out herself while Kimmie Gibbler violates her banishment in order to keep an eye on the full house.

The prisoners do song and dance routines for Danny until DJ shows up to bail him out.  Right after DJ’s arrival, the cop returns to the police set to tell Danny and Joey that she and the other sorority sisters feel like they’ve learned their lesson so they’re dropping the chargers.  Wait, what?  Then why did DJ have to come down there?  Couldn’t she have been spared the trauma of seeing her father in a prison cell?

Kimmie Gibbler plays pattie cake with Michelle and, once again, the audience is totally amazed.  Everyone comes back from the prison and Danny announces that he’s pissed at Joey but it’s not really clear why.  Danny takes Kimmie Gibbler aside to thank her for helping out by holding it down at the full house while he was in the slammer and for a second it seems like the music is gonna come on and they’re gonna have a touching moment but instead he just takes a week off of her banishment and tells her to get out.

DJ tries to mediate a discussion between Danny and Joey and continuously draws parallels between their dumb ass relationship and her dumb ass friendship with Kimmie Gibbler.  Danny realizes that Joey is his Kimmie Gibbler and Joey asks if they can still be bosom buddies.  There, they said it.

Jesse comes home and tells Danny about what a shitty time he had on his countryside ride, creating a hilarious bookend for the episode.  In conclusion,  I’d just like to point out that the episode was called “Fraternity Reunion” and nobody ever went to a fraternity reunion.

Tune in next week for the Season 3 finale!  I haven’t watched the episode yet but if it’s the one I think it is based on the title then we are in for some shit!

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Responses

  1. The chronology on this show makes no fucking sense at all. If it’s a 10-year reunion, the guys are what, 33 at MOST? And DJ is in middle school and is 12 or 13? Are we supposed to believe that Danny Tanner had a shotgun wedding when he was like, 19? This fucking show….

    • thanks for writing in! i’ve actually been able to piece together a kind of danny tanner chronology… danny turned 30 in season 1, which makes him 32 in season 3. dj’s about 12 so she had to be born when danny was still in college. i guess danny graduated when he was 22 so that would make the 10 year reunion aspect make sense, but it is pretty weird to think about a married guy with a 2 year old kid being in a fraternity.

      • Actually the writers are consistent about their ages which is shocking. In the season three episode “Star Search,” Danny shows a video of himself interviewing Joey for their college tv station and during it he pulls out a photo of a new born DJ.

  2. I vaguely remember this episode, but for some reason, Jesse’s big monologue about his countryside drive sticks out.

    “Couldn’t she have been spared the trauma of seeing her father in a prison cell?”

    I’d be more worried about the trauma of seeing her dad in drag.

    Speaking of which, why is it that when guys dress in drag on a sitcom some creepy dude always thinks they’re the hottest dish in the room. I don’t think there has ever been a “men dress up as women” sitcom cliche which did not correspond with a “creepy dud thinks fugly guy in drag is hot for some unknown reason” cliche.

    • i thought about addressing the trauma of dj seeing danny in drag but the more i thought about it the more it seemed to me that, after years of living with these guys, you’d kind of assume that they did this kind of shit at least occasionally.

      • I suppose, after living with Joey for 3 years, seeing her dad incarcerated and dressed in drag probably doesn’t rank in the top 10 of traumatic experiences DJ has had.

  3. Oh yeah, the season finale is the one you think it is.Lol, ‘enjoy’ watching I’ll just stick to reading the recap.Yep, that is one of the most boring episodes. (well this one sort of is too but I only saw parts of it because it was boring). I guess it doesn’t really make sense for two grown men to care about a stuffed seal.But then again, it’s television, so I guess anything is possible. The problem is, I think FH tried to be one of those realistic shows(by talking about real issues , kind of like 7th Heaven) but, like you said numerous times, the way they handle the real situations is in no way…well, real! Sorry if I’m not making sense I’m tired lol

  4. Ah, the one where they dress in drag. Not that I particularly recall this episode, I just knew it had to happen sometime.

    It’s always interesting to me how tv’s were treated like a sacred household item on sitcoms. I guess it’s kind of a meta thing, right?

    It probably is, but I also think it’s a testament to the awesome times we live in where owning a TV (or several) isn’t that big a deal anymore. Like, remember when TV characters made a big deal about getting a VCR and now you can buy one for like $15?

    That said, while I don’t remember much of this episode, I have haunting recollections of DJ and Kimmie dangling that TV over the railing…

    They seem to have been working their way through every completely fucking obvious sitcom cliché, and I think the only reason it’s taken them so long to get to this one is because they wasted a bunch of times doing others more than once.

    Ain’t that the truth? Well said.

    Also, why is it in all sitcoms which feature men dressed in drag (so pretty much all sitcoms…) EVERYONE falls for it, when it couldn’t be more obvious the men are wearing wigs and completely old-fashioned clothes?

    The sorority sisters actually stole this thing and displayed it prominently in their sorority house for like 10 years.

    Also, shouldn’t the fraternity brothers that joined after Danny and Joey left have been trying to get it back if it’s that damned important? Isn’t that something fraternities/sororities do? What kind of dumbass fraternity relies on Danny Tanner and Joey Gladstone to steal back their mascot (or whatever the hell that seal is supposed to be)?

    so she decides to go bail Danny out herself

    Wait, can DJ drive now? I feel like that’s the kind of thing the show would have covered in it usual ham-fisted manner. Also, what exactly were Danny and Joey arrested for? Attempting to steal a dumbass fraternity mascot? Would cops actually book someone for that?

    Danny realizes that Joey is his Kimmie Gibbler

    Comparing Kimmie Gibbler to Joey might just be the most insulting thing Danny’s ever done to her…

    Jesse comes home and tells Danny about what a shitty time he had on his countryside ride, creating a hilarious bookend for the episode.

    Huh, I wonder why they wrote Jesse out of this episode so completely? Just to setup the whole “DJ bails out Danny” thing? Writing him out like that strikes me as the kind of thing better shows do the week one of their stars is hosting Saturday Night Live or something.

    In conclusion, I’d just like to point out that the episode was called “Fraternity Reunion” and nobody ever went to a fraternity reunion.

    Haha! Excellent timing on that line. Laughed my ass off.

    • thanks, as always, teebore! the only thing i gotta point out is that dj calls a cab to get to the jail. as much as i hate to defend Full House, i try to give them credit for actually addressing story points when they happen. as for jesse, i wondered about his cameo appearance myself. it reminded me of the episode of taxi where judd hirsch was filming ordinary people so alex goes skiing and calls in at the beginning and end of the episode to learn about whats been going on. maybe jesse was drumming for the beach boys or something?

      • You know, I bet you’re right. “Drumming for the Beach Boys” sounds a lot more likely than “hosting SNL” or “filming a movie”.

  5. you’re welcome.

  6. and when they are in drag watching all the women, trying to fit in, the camera pans to watch some lady’s ass walk away all swingy-swingy and danny says, “how do they do that?” all gross and lustful which apparently I have remembered all my life. full house you warped my budding womanhood.

  7. This has been, so far, the funniest post for me. No idea why. But this episode has always made me SO angry. The sorority stole the fraternity seal. So, to start with, THE SEAL BELONGS TO THE FRATERNITY. But secondly, we’re obviously talking about stupid college pranks and rivalries. Joey and Danny go to steal it back. This is not problematic because, to recap, the seal IS THEIR FRATERNITY’S and this whole thing is part of stupid college pranks and rivalries. So, when the guys are caught….one of the sorority sisters ARRESTS THEM. She’s like the girl who insults kids in elementary school and then tattles when they insult her back. You stole the seal, they’re stealing it back. Why does no one at the sorority call her out on the whole “WAY overreacting” thing? And why does no one at the police station point out that, um, people aren’t actually arrested for pulling completely harmless college pranks and she’s kinda, sorta an awful human being who is abusing her power. Seriously, she pulls out that badge and I legimately expect Danny to bust out with an ‘are you kidding me, lady? It’s an effin’ college prank. Back off!’

    • Yeah, this is what bothered me most about the ep. And it’s a bit of Truth in Television, too. People are that hypocritical and horrible that when they do something wrong, it’s peachy! But cross them and you’re in for a world of trouble.

  8. “Danny runs in, gets totally fucking pissed off and uses the incident to vent a bunch of his hatred towards Kimmie Gibbler.”

    Of COURSE! DJ fucks shit up, and instead of doling out any punishment on his own kid, who’s obviously flawless, he takes out his anger on the awesome Kimmy Gibbler. He can’t handle that Kimmy is way more awesome this his own daughter, so obviously has to make Kimmy look bad here.

    Also, Joey + Danny in drag = yet another homosexual reference on the show. And of course a waiter has to hit on one of them. Of course.

  9. Joey went to college? Do they ever address what he majored in?

    And thanks for clarifying the time line. It really doesn’t wash that Danny would be in a fraternity while married with a kid. Lame.

  10. Ha – this is the episode I was thinking of when I misread “Granny Tranny” – I knew I had seen Danny in drag at some point. Now I need to go purge my brain of any remaining Full House memories – I actually wish I was wrong about half the shit I remember from this shitshow.

  11. “resulting in a bunch more screencaps that a bunch of people will lift for their tumblr pages. Don’t forget to plug the site!”

    LOL, that sucks man. Bunch of crooks on the internet.

    And the screencap of Danny between the two convicts, I remember the one on the left in denim being on the show a few times.

  12. I’m surprised they never did the having-a-baby-in-a-stuck-elevator cliche. Any time I’m in a damn elevator I side-eye people to make sure I’m not going to get stuck watching Zack Morris deliver Mrs. Belding’s baby while lesbian Tory stands in the corner freaking out.

    Also, there’s an awful lot of feathered bangs in that picture of the sorority chicks attacking Danny and Joey…

  13. Kid Joey, old man Joey, lady Joey- they’re all hotter than real Joey.


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